Heaven
by jadekiss25
Summary: R&R thanks! oneshot... Brooke wants heaven, Lucas gives it to her... LB... first attempt at writing fanfiction hope it doesn't suck that bad...


Heaven (1/1) by: Lizz  
  
Author's Note: I haven't seen enough Lucas and Brooke around this place so I decided to do something about it!  
  
Rating: PG13  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anything except for. oh no wait, I don't own anything.  
  
so here goes.  
  
She sees his face again.  
  
It's not supposed to be there. It's not supposed to be him. She can't have him because he is too good for her, and she knows it. So she makes do with what she can get. But she always sees his face.  
  
It's been happening every time for the last few weeks, but she doesn't care. She doesn't even know the name of the boy next to her, but she doesn't care. She barely even remembers her own name.  
  
For a split second, she feels a pang of guilt. She had been able to control it before, but ever since she had met him.  
  
She'd known immediately that it would be heaven the day she got him where she wanted him. That she would give him heaven, and he would give it back to her. But she knows it's never going to happen, because he doesn't want the simple things. He wants to give her the things she doesn't want - the stares, the flowers, the butterflies. She already gets the butterflies. And she doesn't like them.  
  
His face moans as she straddles him.  
  
It doesn't make a difference, she thinks as everything becomes blurry. I'll never really have him. Tomorrow I'm going to wake up and he won't be there.  
  
But right now she sees him as she cries out in passion.  
  
And she's almost in heaven.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
She forgets about the butterflies when she calls him.  
  
He sounds surprised when he picks up the phone, but he promises to come right over nonetheless. She waits for him outside, too worried to smile when she sees him pull up in his tow truck. He was a knight in shining armor charging in on his white steed.  
  
She wishes he would be her knight someday.  
  
Part of her brain, the rational part, screams because she knows that she can't be thinking about him right now. The other part wants him, wants to forget about everything else, including more important matters, and just jump him there on the spot.  
  
The rational part wins.  
  
They don't talk until they are back home. She doesn't want him to stay but she doesn't know why. He stays anyway. Her heart skips a beat when he says he wants to hang out and talk.  
  
She agrees.  
  
When he wants to talk about her, she talks about Peyton instead. She talks about him, about school, about anything except for her. She's just not ready to share that chapter of her life to anybody yet. Of course he notices, so he talks about his mom instead.  
  
He asks why she called him instead of Nathan. She wants to tell him, but she doesn't. She says that she knew he would come through. He tells her that he doesn't think she is just a brainless slut and the edges around her heart soften a little. She starts to walk away as the sun starts to rise. She wants to run away from him before he takes all his nice words back and calls her for what she really is.  
  
But he tells her to call him.  
  
And she's almost in heaven.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
She sees him the very next morning.  
  
He's in his natural habitat and his guard is down. She decides right there that she likes him playing out by the riverside than in the gym. She can tell that he's happier where there's no attention on him, no pressure or stuffy air, only freedom. He lives for the freedom and the creativity that the game gives him.  
  
She doesn't mind him playing outside either. She knows she is getting possessive when the thought that there will be no other females around to ogle him pleases her.  
  
She wonders if he will ever be possessive of her.  
  
As he turns and sinks another basket, she brushes over the soon-to-be- bruise near her ribs that she received after returning home that morning. For a moment, her smile falters as she thinks of what he would say about the bruises that she had, and as she thinks of all the bruises that she would get because of him. He notices her approaching and she sees the small spark in his eyes that suddenly appears and the smile is back.  
  
The bruises are a small price to pay.  
  
His friend's name is Mouth. That was her nickname too, back in summer camp, but not because she slept with her mouth open. She makes small talk with Mouth until the game ends and Mouth walks away and he turns to her. She sees him approaching and puts on the sexiest smile she can muster up as her stomach does flip-flops.  
  
He smiles back.  
  
And she's almost in heaven.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
She's lost but she likes it.  
  
As she sails deeper into his eyes she knows she is going into uncharted territory. It almost scares her because it's a first date and she doesn't know what to expect. She hates not knowing, but she supposes that it's her just desserts considering who she is. Anybody who's anybody knows.  
  
She doesn't do dates.  
  
It's his first date too, she notes, but she also notices that it's easier for him. He's in his element - his idea of a good time is sitting and talking over hot chocolate, or perhaps settling down in an easy chair with a good novel. He wants to read her emotions and her thoughts, he cares about the emotions. She was more of a tactile person, she decides, but she is willing to quell her cravings for just a little bit so she can listen to him.  
  
She is getting drunk off his smell from his aftershave. Ralph Lauren. She knows many guys who have that scent. But it's different on him, because he is different. He's exactly what she expects him to be, but it gives her no satisfaction. It gives her the chills instead. He is like nobody she's ever met because she cannot read him but he can read her so easily. She knows he is out for something, every guy is, but it scares her not knowing what it is, because she needs to know so she can be ready for it. And she knows it is going to happen. It always happens.  
  
She doesn't know what he had expected of her. Everyone else who had ever been with her had just seen her at face value - an easy and free way to get a good time. His eyes meet hers and she freezes.  
  
He isn't everyone else.  
  
But is she?  
  
The feelings swirling up inside her are alien. She supposes it had something to do with the way he is looking at her. He is looking at her. Not at her body. And it is a different kind of look too. It is as if she is the only thing he could see. Not as if she is a fresh piece of meat at the supermarket among other, less desirable meat.  
  
The tingles in her stomach do the electric slide.  
  
He cares. It is so painfully obvious, she wonders what she ever did to deserve this punishment. If there is one thing she hates, it is charity, and it feels like that is what she is getting right now. He is giving her his all right now, and she does not know how to repay him. So she hates it until she catches his gaze and she makes her decision.  
  
For the first time that afternoon, she is scared of what she is about to give him because it is the first time she would give it to anyone since the last time. And she had promised not to give it to anyone after the last time. But even before she realizes it, she can feel that she is ready. And she can already feel her soul getting gift-wrapped and getting delivered to him as she starts talking about her deepest and darkest secrets. About her greatest fears.  
  
She feels his arm around her neck and her shoulders catch on fire. His touch is like an inferno of gentleness, a bush of thorns made of silk. But she doesn't resist, so he tightens his grip.  
  
And she's almost in heaven.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
She is genuinely happy for the first time in ages.  
  
Which is why she knows it is going to end soon. And the moment she walks out of his room and sees the two of them together, she knows that it just has. But she knows that she has no right to feel sorry for herself because Peyton wanted him first. And Peyton always got what she wanted, at least when it had something to do with her as well.  
  
He looks torn and for a split second she is angry. He was with her. They had had a fun afternoon just hours earlier and she had been sure that she had finally gotten him. But now she remembers what he wants. Peyton. He had wanted her first as well.  
  
The silence drowns out the sound of her slowly breaking heart.  
  
She feels a spark of life as Peyton turns to leave, which quickly flatlines when he calls her back. None of them want to be in that house right now, that is for sure. But when she sees that spark that she just had in Peyton's eyes, she knows that it is over.  
  
When she was a child, she had dreamed of a happy ending. She dreamed of riding off into the sunset with her knight. Just earlier today she had imagined it to be with Lucas. Now she looks out the window into the descending sun and all its beautiful oranges and yellows and reds and purples and she knows that she will never have her happy ending. Because she will never, should never be able to experience anything as beautiful as the sunset. As beautiful as him. Because she knows he'll make the right choice and he'll choose Peyton.  
  
So when he chooses her she can't move. She thinks that time has stopped until she sees Peyton try to get out of the house as fast as possible. She feels dizzy. This wasn't supposed to happen. He wasn't supposed to choose her. She would mess up his life, just like she messed up her own. He was supposed to choose Peyton, they were supposed to go and be miserable together while she was miserable alone.  
  
But he chooses her. So she takes it.  
  
And she's almost in heaven.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
She smiles as she watches him.  
  
He doesn't know about it, but she watches him every night they spend together. She doesn't ever want him to find out, because it will just be another one of those girly things that she does that he thinks is cute but she thinks is embarrassing. And he would tease her about it every time he catches her and she would blush and he would move in for the kill and their lips would slowly meet and-  
  
She decides that she wouldn't mind so much.  
  
The first night she had been wary. She told him she had gone over to his place because she was scared of the thunder. He told her it was funny that she would drive for ten minutes in the thunder and the storm to get over to his place when she could hide under the covers at her own house. She told him what she really wanted.  
  
And they talked for the whole night. She stayed glued in his arms while he smelled her hair and they stayed huddled under the covers for the whole night. She wanted him to fall asleep first, otherwise he would claim that she snored throughout the whole night. So while he dozed off, she watched him.  
  
She isn't scared of thunder anymore.  
  
They haven't done it yet, but she knows the time will come when they are both ready. Because she isn't. She doesn't want to give something so perfect away yet. So she waits, and she watches him while he sleeps. This night is different however. She isn't sure whether he notices it in his dream state, but it had come to her just a few minutes ago while she was watching.  
  
She flicks off the lamp beside her and whispers three little words.  
  
His arm slowly creeps around her as she snuggles in.  
  
He whispers the three little words back.  
  
And she's in heaven. 


End file.
